Sunday, November 18, 2007

V'limkal'lai nafshi tidom": I'm not there yet :(

"And to those who insult me, let my soul be silent," says the individual's closing prayer at the end of the communal Amidah prayer.

I wish I could do that.

But it still bothers me that, even though I've been going up onto the bima (pulpit) to lead Ashrei for probably more than a decade, there's almost always someone--male or female--in our local congregation who whispers to his or her neighbor, "There she goes, up on the bima again." Sigh. How many times do I have to remind people that our synagogue belongs to a movement that's been ordaining women rabbis since 1985? I don't understand why a woman going up unto the bima in a Conservative synagogue is such a big deal.

Some people in my neighborhood synagogue complain about me spending so much time at a different shul, some because they miss me (aww) and some because they don't like the idea. Well, why should they expect me not to davven elsewhere, under these circumstances? I'm sorry, but a decade's worth of repeated insults hurts.

4 Comments:

Blogger -suitepotato- said...

You my sympathies. I am in process of conversion and my local synagogue is Conservative, and thank G-d has a female rabbi. I say thank G-d because the question of female involvement is not going to be dared by anyone which is good. Now is too volatile a time in the world of Judaism for there to be backbiting and needless nitpicking based on pointless ideas that don't further G-d.

Fortunately I can be as old school as I want or as little as the rabbi sees fit without jogging sensibilities. I wish that soon you too can have that freedom as well.

Mon Nov 19, 06:21:00 PM 2007  
Blogger Shira Salamone said...

Suitepotato, it really is a pity that there's more than enough infighting within the Jewish community to make some of us rather miserable, at times.

Good luck with the "great switch."

Tue Nov 20, 10:02:00 AM 2007  
Blogger Sheyna said...

Once in a while when the rabbi's out of town, services are led by one of two women (one's an ordained rabbi, the other one has everything but the piece of paper). Some of those times, the shlichat tzibur is also female, as are everyone else on the bima for a given aliyah.

It's then that I hear comments from the congregation, usually all something along the lines of:

"You know, the service runs a lot smoother when the women are in charge."

May you find support in the community that's best for you.

Sun Dec 16, 04:37:00 PM 2007  
Blogger Shira Salamone said...

" . . . the service runs a lot smoother when the women are in charge." Now *there's* a line I've certainly never heard in my local synagogue!

To be fair to the gents, though, the ideal situation, from my own personal perspective, would be one in which no one even noticed the gender of the shaliach tzibur/service leader and the baal koreh/Torah reader.

Sun Dec 16, 09:48:00 PM 2007  

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